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Technically, I guess it is pronounced like “we” not like “why”, but the point is that the Nintendo Revolution is now the Nintendo Wii.

In other news, Microsoft and Sony both announced the renaming of their next-gen consoles (the Xbox 360 and PS3). The new names will be Huu and Wahtte. This way, the corporation giants can almost start a baseball team.

When asked what his motives were behind the decision, Bill Gates simply replied “Because I’m Bill fucking Gates!”

Is abortion right? Now that we (basically) have the technology to clone people, should we? These are the kinds of questions that I would answer here in a scholarly fashion if I really wanted to expend the effort to do so. But I have thought of a much better solution to this whole situation.

Somebody needs to fund (don’t worry, the money will comeback to that person ten-fold) a project to clone Jesus from the DNA that can be scrubbed off the Shroud of Turin. Don’t start poking holes in my plan with your fancy “logic” and “factual information” just yet. You’ve got to work with me. Continuing on, what you have to do next is, once Jesus is of sufficient age (anywhere between 18-30 years old, really) get him really really high on whatever drugs you prefer. But you’ve got to make sure that you don’t kill him (imagine what a mess that would be) and you also have to make sure that he is at least minorly coherent when he speaks.

The final step: Put Jesus on live TV on every station around the world (this is how the money to fund the cloning would come back…I mean you could demand $500,000 from each and every network and they’d still all pay you) for a 30 minute (strict time limit) call-in (you could also charge for the phone calls to Jesus for another source of income…people would still pay thousands to talk to Jesus) “Question and Answer” session.

It’d be great fun, I’m telling you.

Apparently, MySpace has taken down about 200,000 of its approximately 60 million profiles. Still no word on why they forgot to delete the other 59,800,000 profiles.

Side note (or rather, bottom note): I don’t have a MySpace account, never have, and never plan to. If you want me to get one, I will personally come to your house and take a crap on your keyboard. Also, if you don’t know why MySpace is, you’re lucky (and very sheltered).