Fedorpheux.com

Okay, I don’t know how long this one will be, but I figured that I should at least write something. This time I searched Google Image Search for the perfectly innocent phrase chew bubblegum. Right off the bat, I was hit with painfully ugly results. The following is the very first result of all of the results for that search:

Well, apparently this guy came to kickass and chew bubblegum, and now he’s all out of bubblegum. Wait, I take my previous sentence back. It is obviously way too cool for this horrible picture. Talk about mullet to the extreme, not to mention the huge sunglasses. His rifle and ammo belt thing over his shoulder makes him look like one of those guys that sits in his backyard all his childhood shooting .22s at empty tin cans on the fence post while watching his pig make love to his sheep. Or maybe that’s just my impression of him.
The American flag in there adds touch of that feel that says “I’m a real American. I’ve got a mullet, big genitals, and no brain.” That little smirk on his face makes me think he feels cool but doesn’t even have any idea how to use the gun in is hands. Speaking of which, it probably isn’t even a real gun. But damn, doesn’t he look sexy with that hair and that flanel shirt?
According to the page that this is from, this poor sap’s name is Roddy Piper. I’ve never heard of him before and likely will never hear of him again, and I think the reason for that is shown in this picture. If you want to see an even bigger picture of this sexy hunk of man meat, click here (I’m not hosting this other picture so it may not be available if their host takes it down). Okay, well I’m a little too scared but mostly too lazy to go any further with this Goomage.

Have you ever been confronted in a dark alley by a person looking similar to this guy? Well, quickly, send in your ideas for Goomages to goomage@fedorpheux.com now, before you get killed by the mullet of doom!